Breaking Wind In Style

Memorial Day weekend was nice, we did not have any plans other than building a fire pit and a pergola, only one of these got built, hint it was the one in which it would be perfectly ok acceptable to mix with fire. I ended up not being able to get wood delivered for the pergola and unfortunately the little 6’ bed on my truck is simply not long enough to haul a bunch of 16’ boards. I started the fire pit Friday evening and then finished Saturday morning. During the process I noted that my estimating skills were significantly lacking as I ended up making three separate trips to Lowes to buy gravel and sand for the base, fortunately I am capable of counting up to 36 so I did not have to go back for paver’s stones, although even that was a close thing since my first iteration of the bottom ring had one too many blocks in it and I didn’t even catch the error until late in the process. Overall I was very pleased with the final product; it has been a while since I’ve been able to have a decent sized fire in a real fire pit.FullSizeRender

Tuesday evening Leslie had gone to a women’s group with our church so I was at home alone… or as alone as one can be with two children and perhaps that is more frighteningly alone than actually being alone. Anyhow, I am lying on the floor alternating between wrestling with Jack and playing with Ayla whenever he would run around the corner. At one point I was looking at my daughter when Jack came running around the corner coming from the kitchen with something between his fingers, something he immediately tried to shove into my mouth. Let me back up a little, since I had gotten home I had noticed little Cheerios scattered all over the floor, the remains of a failed endeavor to allow Jack to tote around a cup of Cheerios as a snack. On numerous occasions I had gotten on to him for trying to eat Cheerios off of the floor. So here I am with my son running towards me full tilt with, what I assume is a Cheerio, grasped between his fingers. Not wishing to consume a floor Cheerio I turned my head and clamped my lips shut. Just missing my mouth, Jack’s hands collided with my cheek and promptly dropped the alleged Cheerio onto my shoulder. In my attempts to locate said Cheerio I was horrified to discover that he had not tried to stuff a Cheerio in my mouth at all, rather he had tried to stuff in a partial fly corpse. Seriously kid? I shudder to think what gave him the idea that we should be eating flies.

Today we held a groundbreaking ceremony on one of our larger projects, despite the fact that we actually broke ground a little over 4 months ago. We had senior level management attend as well as executive level management from our customer; of course no groundbreaking ceremony would be complete without the obligatory politicians. While this ceremony had been in the works for quite some time this project was only recently transferred over to me and it appeared that the management of this ceremony was well in hand by others in my business. Tuesday I did a little digging and was horrified to see how many of the little details had been overlooked. Working with our contractor I was able to get everything nailed down by yesterday afternoon, including portable restroom facilities (i.e. port-o-johns) fit for a king… or at least a state senator. It is no stretch of the imagination to say that this facility was significantly nicer than my bathroom at home. My team was impressed with the fact that I was able to locate a solar powered facility with air conditioning, running water, and real toilet paper. In fact, at the end of the day the port-o-potty kind of stole the show, I got more comments on that thing than I did the rest of the solar field. I suppose the hardwood floors, stylized vanity, and cherry cabinets might have had something to do with that. I wonder if it would be appropriate to mention this port-o-potty next year when it comes time for my performance review. After all, my boss was one of the ones who commented on the facilities. I’ll put it this way, we were breaking ground in style, I just wanted everyone in attendance to feel comfortable breaking wind in style as well.FullSizeRender1

It is worth mentioning that last week as I was in the process of posting my newsletter I happened to see what search term produced the most links to my blog from the previous week. I’m not certain exactly what cued my blog to produce a hit on this particular search term but I found it quite hilarious either way, hilarious and probably appropriate as well. The search term was “my neighbors think I’m weird.” I’m certain there cannot be any correlation.

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